RE: the question: ":Why do forum interactions become contentious". . .


I've just had a very unexpected and very unpleasant PM from a forum participant. 

He'd been suggesting I buy a certain component  and I told him politely that I didn't visualize that particular purchase fitting in with my long-range plans.  

His response was to accuse me of wasting everyone's time and to call me an "effing idiot" (except he spelled "effing" correctly). 

The great majority of interactions I've had here have been very enjoyable and recent input from
more experienced forum members has helped greatly in clarifying my plan for the next upgrade cycle. 

The thread on lesser-know Jazz has been great-- lots of participation and lots of terrific suggestions. 

Nevertheless, I've decided to take a break. 

Best regards,

Stuartk



stuartk
I tell people “if you want to make GOD laugh tell him your plans.”
Easily the best thing I've heard in a long time.
May I borrow it?

All the best,
Nonoise


If this was real life and not a forum of anonymous names it wouldn't be this way. Lots of forum tough guys here. In person they wouldn't say a word.
Not so sure some of tough guys on social media forums aren't also some of the most argumentative person to person. I've known a number of 'banty roosters' in my life, they'll cut you in person just like they do here. A couple of these guys were/are audiophiles.

Some claim you need to develop thick skin, thick skin types often use consensus bias in interactions, assume others have equally thick skin. Thick skin has fertile ground to grow in, may not even notice over time. Thick skin can turn into suit of armor.
I've never received a nasty PM, or a PM - period - come to think of it.

Where do I sign up?

DeKay
I did finally, just recently. The recently closed thread "crazy crazy crazy" we were discussing a VERY important topic. Some didn't see it that way, their choice/opinion, freedom of speech. Well, a long standing member here, whom I've never crossed posting paths with, and not even participating in that thread, sent me a PM insulting a small Bible quote. (Clay and Iron). No big deal. Then PM'd me again directly insulting me. I replied: Your comments are not useful nor are they welcome". With that he sent an even nastier one. HA! If these examples can't get along civilly in our small Audio world, how will they work together with others in our real world when we NEED TO STICK TOGETHER?? I hope "roberttcan" see's this. HA! I take these people in full stride.