This is for the guy's trying to figure out how to talk the lil woman into letting them bring home a tube amp or big guady speaker's.

The point system of WAF.

In the world of romance only 1 rule apply's to men.

Make the lil woman happy!

Do something she like's & you get point's :)

Do something she dislike's & point's are subtracted :(

Do something she expect's & you get nothing !

Here is a guide to the point system.


Simple dutie's.

You make the bed (+1)

You make the bed but do it wrong (0)

You just throw the bed spread over rumpled sheet's (-2)

You go out to buy her tampon's (+5)

In the rain (+10)

But return with beer (-15)

You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)

You check out a noise & it's nothing (0)

You check out a noise & it is something (+5)

You beat it to death with a iron bar (+15)

But it was her cat (-100)


Social gathering's.

You stay by her side the entire party (0)

You act interested in her friend's (+10)

You ditch her & split with a friend from college (-50)

Your friend's name is tina (-200)

Tina is an exotic dancer (-500)

With breast implant's (-750)

Really really big breast implant's (-1,000)


Her birthday.

You take her out to dinner. (0)

Then a movie (+1)

It's a movie she like's (+10)

You dont fall asleep (+15)

It's a movie you hate (+25)

You take her to a movie you like (-25)

And it's called death cop 3(-50)

You lied & said it was about orphan's (-100)


Your physique.

You get a pot belly (-5)

You exersise & loose the belly (+10)

You start wearing baggy pants & don ho shirts to hide it (-20)

You say that's ok you got a belly too (-10,000)


The big question.

She ask's you,do i look fat ? (-10) that's right
you loose point's no matter what you say mister!

You hesitate in responding (-10)

You reply, where? (-15)

Any other response (-50)



She want's to talk (-5)

You agree to talk (+10)

You listen (+5)

For more than 30 minute's (+20)

Then she realize's it's because you fell asleep (-100)

You get the picture!
Please don't judge me too severely.

I will always return with beer no matter where I go.

The pub/beer and wine store is on the way to all shopping.
And as alot- actually, all of my friends are at some point or another in the pub, it would be rude not to stop in for a quick pint. Just to say hello. (Getting milk can take 1.5-2 hours.) At least my wife knows I am polite.

I did in fact get up to investigate suspicious noise a very short while ago and stepped on her cat, sleeping on the stairs. I then had a brave wife along side me investigating multiple strange noises, albeit with arms at her waist (is it just me or do our wives remind us of our mothers?)

I can not stay by her side at social gatherings, as her friends are twits- (think single mid 30's who really, really, really, really want husbands- you know what I mean) And, for some reason, I always find the company of strange women attractive. Maybe attractive is the wrong word.

I don't really like going to the movies because she wants to go Friday/Saturday nights. So, my brother in law will almost always come along, and after a pre movie dinner (I'll come clean right now- dinner for me is an appetizer and several drinks) we'll make it to the movie theater wich is across the street. Wich is next to the sports bar above the local hockey rink. We'll meet her and her friend(s) at an arranged time later on. If I am to spend 2-3 hours in the dark,(and pay for it?) I'll sleep.

Pot belly? I'll let you do the math, but it is barely noticeable, and I am a great dresser. Really.

If she asks me if she looks good in her outfit I'll always say yes- she does. Somehow, though, she seems to feel that I answer her before I even look. Really, what changes in hours-days? It's not as though she can morph, right?

Oh, I do enjoy good conversation. It really is one of my favorite things in life. Untill I get the urge to listen to music.......

So, by your rating system, I'm probably at -354,000 or something to that effect.

I believe WAF has long since been irrelevant at least in my case. I mean what about HAF? I routinely have to put up candle parties and such (with above mentioned single females no less) and her "owning" the T.V. (good ridance, she can have it and its evening soaps/reality/home make-over filth.)

Oh, and please- I'll send one of you my personal address so that you can kill me if I ever have to watch "Felicity" even one more time as she owns ALL SEASON EPISODES.

I guess between her T.V. and my two channel, were even!
You earn enough money in a month to buy any tube amp or big gaudy speakers - retail (+1,000,000)
BigJoe, please take this the right way, I mean it with kindness and knowing that English may be a 2nd language for you: The plural of something is (usually) denoted with an "s". There is no apostrophe (') needed. Therefore, more than one "friend" is spelled "friends", NOT "friend's". Also, verbs do NOT need the apostrophe: wants, needs, asks, etc.

Okay, English class is dismissed . BTW, I got a nice chuckle out of your humor!!
Absolutely hilarious! I laughed so loud, my girlfriend kept asking what's so funny. Great post!

i was born in motown.....may favorite t-shirt(perhaps they still sell 'em....had a picture of a handgun and said 'come back to detroit, we missed you the first time'. theres no denying that folks in michigan have a great sense of humor.