I repair audio gear for a living and have been at it for nearly 50 years. I have one client who has a small child who likes to push in the DIAMOND domes of his daddy's B&W loudspeakers. After it happened the first time, I made a few suggestions like putting a heavy low obstacle in front of the speakers to prevent him from getting close. Oh, he'll never do it again. I had a long talk with him about this and he says he'll never do it again. At 5 years of age, these words meant nothing. I have replaced 4 tweeters in less than a year for this man. These tweeters are over $1100 each plus labor and tax that comes to just about $1300 each time.
I guess he really like that kid! Or maybe the college fund will be down to community college by the time the kid is ready to go. |
Oh my god! You were sitting in the room with her, watched while she moved the speakers, and now you are complaining about HER! Get a grip and take some responsibility! She had no idea what she was doing, but you did, and you did nothing about it... Learn from the experience and speak up. Perhaps you were led by other thoughts! |
Hello,
this seams like a good lesson for everyone who cares about their gear. Tell people your concern, protect your gear, and trust no one. It is being overprotective, but it is such a pain to deal with it later. It is amazing how many people do not claim responsibility. I would write down your specs, get locks for your gear. And when you have a service person in your listening room cover your gear in moving blankets and watch them like a hawk. I don’t leave the room. If I do I would ask them to leave. Also make sure the service company gets you a copy of their insurance. I know this sounds way too over protective. Look at what can happen. Some gear cannot be fixed or replaced. As for the girl who moved the speakers. Ask her to help you set them back up. If she doesn’t, she better be worth the hassle. |
If you are going to invite people into your house you should treat them like guest. If you don't want them looking at, touching, breathing on, moving or otherwise interacting with your high fidelity system, then keep your system in a locked room. If that is not possible, then you need to accept that there could be an "incident". What the OP described is not a big deal. Even if the person had damaged the loudspeakers the proper response of the host should be, "Don't worry, it's not a problem."
Tradesmen are a different type of problem. IMO, you should be in the room with them at all times.
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Let people trash your stereo and laugh it off i don't think so. |
I brought a buddy to an audiophile friend's house. Went to his music room to listen to a new record I gave as Christmas gift. My buddy didn't really pay attention to the music but was curious, approached the KEF 105.2 left channel, then touched and turned the mid-range and tweeter enclusures. I couldn't say a word as I watched in disbelief but our host blurted, "Oh nooh...!", then proceeded to explain in a nice way to my buddy what he just did. That ruined our listening session. And I had to apologize. Good my friend kept a record of everything.
Sad story, but there are people who don't know enough about stereo. Everytime we invite people, especially those we are not familiar with to our music rooms, we also invite risk.
After that incident, I took note of everything from stylus tracking pressure to speaker position in my own system.
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Grab a female "Guests" purse and start rummaging through it... Yup that will end in a restraining order against you, PTSD charges and restitution for the victim that you pay for, Lets not forget the Xanex/Kpin prescription that she needs now... A "NEW' guest would never touch your Audio gear. "Life partners" know you and would never... Just a random??? There are 3.5 billion women on Earth and much MUCH easier that getting your sound stage correct. |
I don’t think non audiophile’s understand or believe the money our equiptment costs, they think of music systems as cheap Sears stuff, regardless you shouldn’t go into someone’s home and move or touch things without asking first. |
Wow, this thread really took on a life of its own! Four simple words: "Please don't do that". |
I think to a non-audiophile it's like turning a chair a few inches to better see the other person... |
+1 big-greg, jl35. I don’t think the OP’s guest knew what she was doing. Maybe it’s more like watching a TV show, and turning the TV slightly so it is more viewable from your seat. Yes, you should always ask first… But I imagine she did not know the implications. @onhwy61 and others with similar statements, I do not get your premise that you standby and watch while a guest does something drstructive, either out of ignorance or malevolence… A host only need practice kindness, not foolishness. OP: What happened to you while you watched as your guest rearranged you speakers? Were you paralyzed? Others who are incensed: if it were you, would you also have just stood by and watched and then gotten resentful?
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Where did I say "standby and watch"? I said to either make your system unavailable or accept some responsibility for what may happen. Is that hard to understand?
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glupson I understand the mathematical point. I truly do. However, having some kind of attachment to humans rather than to some inanimate object is what I am talking about. It may be whatever kind of difference, but I had people put glasses all over the place and I never got upset. It is simply that once I invite a person, that one is welcome to feel at home. Including opening refrigerator, moving speakers, etc. What kind of host restricts guests? Again, maybe different world and values we all have. I think you are imagining some false dichotomy. You, the chill, friendly host, me (or others) uptight, breaking in to some party-pooping anger. No. Someone puts their drink on my speaker, I solve the problem by getting a tray or coaster and putting the drink on that for them. People feel very at home in my place. I host people all the time (I have guests coming tonight to watch a movie, had guests a couple days ago watching movies), my place is the de facto gathering place for certain big sporting events (I have a great home theater room with a big projection screen) and everyone raves about the experience. But, for instance, there is a speaker covered in black velvet (to disappear in low light near the projection screen) near the room entrance. I will sometimes point out to new guests the presence of that speaker so they’ll know not to bump in to it by mistake and possibly knock it over.No one’s time is spoiled by this and usually they thank me for letting them know. I don’t want my equipment to be ruined; my guests don’t want to unknowingly ruin my equipment either. This is not some non-negotiable situation that can only mean me being a prick or their being made to feel unwelcome. Again...do YOU not care about ruining anything in someone else’s home? If YOU as a guest decide to put out a cigarette through the speaker grill of the host’s expensive speakers, do you really see that as your right, and that any consternation from the host is their fault? If so, you’d be a truly rotten guest. If not...then I don’t know what you are going on about this "a host should let a guest do whatever he wants and everyone should be fine with that." |
I actually had the solution to this problem and other uh, nosier problems a long time ago. Blindfolds. If they didn’t agree to it they didn’t come in. Problem solved! 🤗 |
People like to touch things. Go to any car museum, show or display and despite all the Do Not Touch signs displayed in full view, people will touch the cars.
I used to go to a lot of auto shows and it always amazed me. The same goes for museums. If guards and crowd ropes aren't present, people will go right up to a centuries old painting and touch it, knowing they shouldn't.
Ignorance abounds and it's nothing new to anyone here so the onus is on the host to let it be known that no one touches their system. Don't let that little voice in the back of your head tell you you'll be considered weird or eccentric and hope against hope that your guest will behave. They won't. And, you know it, so some proactive measures have to be taken on your part.
I had a friend who'd intentionally touch, tweak and manhandle things just to inflict damage. He was jealous of anyone who had it better than him. It could be anything, a book or magazine, some stereo gear, or even a car and he'd mess with it. It taught me that there are myriad reasons why people do stupid things and not to trust them. Don't even try to figure them out.
All the best,
Nonoise |
prof,
I get it. I may simply be lucky as none of my adult guests ever tried to (semi)intentionally damage anything. At the same time, the last thing on my mind would be resale value. I would be more concerned about hanging out with people who enjoy damaging anything. That would be a wake-up call and price of the damaged speaker may be worth paying to find out this unacceptable personality trait. However, if you place a glass on the speaker, be my, well, guest. It is just a speaker and it is just a glass. For some reason, nobody ever did that. Instead, I put things there all the time. It may help that I do not sell these things so resale value is really not on my personal radar. Moving speakers would be even less important, as far as I am concerned. I do not know if I am a chill friendly host, but, yes, those who get angry about people touching or accidentaly damaging their equipment are uptight.
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If she is a friend with benefits , that's allowed. otherwise show her to the door , lol. |
Hello,
it sounds like if we are chill and are OK when accidents happen then that person is Ok when things go wrong. I respect that and wish I could be like that. For the rest of us who are a little OCD like myself it sounds like we need to do our do diligence and take safeguards. I even understand that your date might have thought you were coo coo for coco puffs and said see ya. You have to decide what is more important to you. |
Hahaha, yeah I’ve had idiots move my speakers. My drunken ex had a bunch of drunken friends from her HS reunion over. There might have been around 50 or more people at the house. My listening room was upstairs, looking down on the great room kitchen area where most people were. I had tunes going so you could hear throughout the house. At one point, a bunch went upstairs, moved my Thiel 2.2’s (on spikes) table and sofa so they could dance.
A spike fell out of one of the speakers (they just sort of slide into holes in the bottom) so it was listing to the starboard. No doubt they tried dragging first, but they were planted! Luckily no damage done to (70lb) speaker or carpet. I was cooking outside so I didn’t know what was going on, just one of my discoveries cleaning up late that evening.
And yes, I've got other horror stories over the decades. Luckily nothing severe.
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Let's not move on the the horrors caused by cleaning ladies.
Turntable owners know this best.
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Let's not move on the the horrors caused by cleaning ladies.
Turntable owners know this best.
Oh yeah. I've fought housekeepers for over 40 years. First thing is tell them the TT is off limits. Some of them start to freak when they see dust on the piano black and still try. Even with a dustcover they'll mess it up. Knocked off the stands, anti-skate laying on the base, belt off the track... But that's better than seeing a piece of "swiffer" hanging off of your stylus... 😭 |
Not having read the whole thread, did you mention whether or not you liked the sound better with the speakers in their new location?
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I once set up a pair of Klipsch kg 1 on a pair of stands for my daughters graduation party. I put my Revels in another room that was not being used.....good thing I did, I walked in and one of our guests was using it as a table, he was literally eating potato salad on top of my speaker.... pretty rude |
Most women should not be allowed to be near a good audio system nor behind the wheel of a car. But here we are, for better or worse.
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Uhhh no. Cant say that in 2020 LOL.
Did the OP get laid the night the horrible injustice was commited? |
uncle monkey
Yup.
When I upgraded my turntable a couple years ago I took the plunge and spent a whopping amount on a Transrotor turntable which came with a really expensive cartridge. I didn’t even set it up for the first month or so as I re-built my equipment rack with an isolation base during that time.Finally, just before we went away on a week vacation the rack was ready, I set up the turntable and had time for about 1/2 hour listen just to make sure things were working. Yay. It sounded glorious.
Came home from vacation, went to listen to a record and...wha? The cartridge was hanging off the arm at a wild angle! Aside from being alarming it was completely perplexing? What the hell happened?
Then I remembered: The Cleaning Lady! She had come while we were away!
I called her and sure enough, yes, she remembered that big new shiny thing in the corner of the room. She was cleaning around it with a cloth and heard a sudden "bang!" Said she notice the long silver thing (arm) hanging at a weird angle. "I guess it caught on my cleaning cloth when I moved my arm." She placed it back like she thought it supposed to be and went on none the wiser. Yup, her cleaning cloth had snagged on the cartridge needle, yanking it off the arm and slamming the arm off the table on to the platter.
Half and hour. Just half an hour of listening to my new expensive turntable is all I got in before the cleaning lady ravaged it. Sigh...
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I would truly like to understand how it would be acceptable to enter someone's house,and think it would be "ok" to move the hosts electronics,furniture or any other items in the house. This is NOT proper behavior. PERIOD.
If you think in any way,shape or form that it is ok,you and I are destined not to be friends or pleasant acquaintances. I was brought up to respect people and their property.
Sometimes,people suck. |
Common sense would have prevented 99.47% of people from moving the speakers. This one got loose.
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Common sense would have prevented 99.47% of people from moving the speakers. This one got loose. Slight correction, common sense would have prevented 99.47% of adults from..... Need a whole different percentage for young kids, they don't usually realize that the big people's speakers are revered holy objects, not just old boxes with cloth on them or funny little round thingies that move when you poke them. |
@prof Nice. What did it cost to fix?
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Half and hour. Just half an hour of listening to my new expensive
turntable is all I got in before the cleaning lady ravaged it. Sigh... I always love how they just sort of prop or set the broken item back and assume you're not going to notice. Like nailing the dead parrot to its perch. So many destroyed things. Had one cleaning lady I kept for years. She wasn't very good - but she had a very light touch! |
I have not had someone move my speakers or subs, but I did have my sister-in-law while staying with us prior to the Philadelphia folk festival drape her underwear on them. Before anyone gets any ideas, we are all in our early to mid 60s. So...
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As a licensed and practicing therapist I get asked this question repeatedly in different settings, but it’s the same fundamental question. Whether it be her moving your things, scoffing at your motorcycle, getting rid of your old torn t-shirts, whatever. My response is always the same:
How does she look in her underwear? |
i keep some venomous reptiles next to mine. never have a problem |
Completely out of line. Regardless of sex or sexual background. I do not know if I would have lost my cool. Or handled the situation casually.
I toohad beer cans put on my speakers And a drunken idiot sit on my subwoofer. I did indeed scream that night. We work hard to obtain this equipment. And yes. We do have an emotional connect with out gear.
People these days. The horror! |
Whether she moved your speakers, your other furniture or did any other like thing in your home without the courtesy of first discussing it with you, does not sound like a good sign. I think asserting oneself like this in order to control or change what someone else has done in their own home suggests worse things for the future. The proper placement of speakers is a personal thing and can take a considerable amount of time in order to get them "just right" - this would have annoyed me a great deal. |
Years ago in a small dedicated audio room I had a pair of monitors I had lovingly built, precisely perched on their shot filled stands. My wife and neighbor friend came down to have a listen and then broke out into a dance. There was a lot of reckless butt gyrating and my neighbor's hip sent my precious speaker project flying into the wall. As she ran from the room there was an "oops sorry". My wife thought that was a sincere and adequate apology. My new room has a lock. |
I have a 8" X 15" laminated sign on the floor about 10 feet out from my Tubed Mono-Blocks....." DANGER " Keep liquids FAR from Tube Amps". I don't think anyone has ever asked any questions and certainly never attempted to move my Soundlab Majestics. |
I find it rude whenever ANYONE moves ANYTHING in my house, let alone my speakers. I would have probably told her to leave. |
You have made my day. I laughed and laughed because you did hit it in the nail. Someone not an audio buff has no clue as to speaker placement and the audacity of coming to your home and rearranging the speakers was too funny. Many years ago, our cleaning helper moved my speakers (on spikes on top of the living room carpet) and I went ballistic. The poor lady could not figure out what to problem was; like its only speakers for crying out loud. Needless to say, she never came cose to my sound system again. So I do sympathize with you.
One question: did you invite your female guest over to your home again? And what was the outcome of the "speaker mover"?
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What does it matter if it was a woman or a man? Bottom line is - your speakers are and look 5 figures and no one should be touching anything they don't own. That's a guest I don't want back in my house and I would have said politely to please not touch my equipment, it's positioned where it is for a reason and is quite expensive. If the person can't respect your wishes or gets offended you don't want them in your house or your life. Happy listening!
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Sounds like you need to shop for a new pair of speakers with better off axis imaging capabilities. The design team, if there is one, of any speaker that requires such precise placement in relation to your listening position needs to return to the drawing board. There are several, many, numerous, speakers on today's market that provide outstanding performance outside the "prime listening position." |
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But everyone knew her as Nancy. |
Audio aside, the scenario would be the same if a guest moved a picture on a host's wall to get a better look. A guest in a home is not automatically given tacit permission to do what every they want. A good host makes guests feel comfortable, a good guest respects a host's hospitality but understands the venue is not owned by the guest.
I would have politely told the guest not to touch the speakers or other equipment in view.
That said- if there was personal interest in the guest, maybe invite her back and ask if she could adjust the speakers in the bedroom. |
Just one question: where is she buried now? |
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But everyone knew her as Nancy"
- Well, she's in the aviary studying trees. I shall return with her straight away. You may wait here in the sitting room or you can sit here in the waiting room. -
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I went back and re-read the original post just to make sure I was clear on what exactly happened. What I couldn't determine was whether the OP was actually in the room with his guest decided to move the speakers. In any case, as was mentioned previously, most people have absolutely no clue how much stereo equipment costs or how fragile they are. Many consider music in the home to be used as background music while they are doing something else. That is all well and good for them. They, on the other hand actually have hobbies or things that are extremenly vaulable to them that other's wouldn't understand also. In this case, even if the OP had been in the room and told the person to please not touch/move the speakers, that person would obey, but would be insulted that the OP asked her to not move them to make them more enjoyable for her. not knowing that speaker placement is absolutely important and actually, not caring. But go to that person's house and move a coffee table or couch and see the sparks fly. 1. if the OP was in the room, he should have immediately seen what was about to happen and asked the person to not touch the speakers. case closed. not problem. 2. if the person moved the speakers uninvited, then that is not only plain rude, but inconsiderate also. People here speak of a person as the "keeper". Well, in my opinion, the "keeper" is the one that ask first and respects your hobbies and personal likes (as long as those don't hurt anyone). I have a very good friend who was also seriously into audio. His then wife decided one day while he was at work to completely redecorate the living room/listening room. She bought all new furniture and completed relocated the stereo equipment and speakers. The speakers were placed in such positions that one couldn't get stereo sound if you tried. it was completely rude and stupid what she did. But, she decided that it was her living room to redecorate and did what she wanted without discussing it first. Needless to say, my friend was pissed and put the system back where it sounded best. She know before they were married that he loved music and placed the equipemne where it would sound best to him. But, obviously, didn't really care. I have had female friends come over and the first thing I would hear would be, "wow, those speakers are really big". What are those big items between the speakers and those cables are really large. comments like that. But, after explaining my love for music and how important equipment and placement was, they settled down and listened to their favorite music and loved it. But, WAF or spouse acceptance factor is absolutely important in the survival of a relationship. these things must be discussed and agreed upon before getting serious. A large misconception (to me) for relationships is that many people feel that the couple must enjoy and do everything together. That is blatently false. There is nothing wrong with respecting the other's need for their own hobbies. Some people don't like wine. doesn't mean you can't enjoy wine or visit beautiful wineries. Same for cars/car events, hiking, cycling, etc. I'll finish by saying that years ago I was in a serious relationship where my significant other used a cleaning person to occasionally come clean the house. I asked her clearly to not have that person clean in the listening room. Well, one day I come home to find my cartridge on the tonearm completely destroyed. The cleaning person decided to polish the rosewood turntable and damaged the cartridge/needle. This was my significant other's fault not the cleaning person's fault because the cleanign person was not told to leave that room alone. however, touching or moving someone else's stuff is just inconsiderate and rude. I restore and own classic cars that are show quality. I can't tell you how often I've entered my cars into cars shows and see people touching the car, rubbing up against them to get a better look with their jeans or belt buckles, or even opening the doors and sitting inside. I actually had a model and her photographer ask could she sit on the car and take pictures. Do you believe that?
enjoy
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I never allow anyone to touch my components. No dogs, cats or children, except grandchildren under close watch. My family came over for Christmas Dinner and wanted to bring their dog into the house. They were shocked when I told them no way. |
